Review for 6x06 'You Can't Handle The Truth'

[galathea]

I had an extremely strenuous work week – my colleague fell ill, just in the middle of the kick-off phase for our new projects and I had to do overtime to cover for her absence – so I was usually dead on my feet when I came home in the evenings and nothing was further from my mind than writing. I tried, of course, but mostly I just stared blankly on my screen for a while, then typed a couple of sentences, before I just crashed on my bed. However, I really wanted to post at least some basic thoughts about You Can’t Handle The Truth, so I decided to simply post what I cobbled together over the week. It’s a bit rough around the edges and probably not a very smooth read, but it has to suffice until I can find the time to give it a good makeover.



You Can’t Handle The Truth by Eric Charmelo and Nicole Snyder follows logically from where last week’s episode left off and allows the brothers to face their issues head on. As I already mentioned in my last review, it would have been difficult for the writers to maintain the next couple of episodes without revealing at least some of Sam’s mystery. It simply wouldn’t have been believable had the brothers carried on as usual after the events of Live Free And Twihard. While Sam’s confession that he doesn’t feel anything comes as no real surprise to the viewer, in conjunction with Veritas’ observation that he is not human anymore, it’s a huge step towards the final reveal, which will no doubt follow in the next episode. I am very happy that the writers decided to move Sam’s storyline forward so quickly, because from here on the brothers can move on to 'fixing' Sam. Now that Sam doesn’t have to pretend anymore and openly asked for Dean’s help, the brothers should be united on a common goal – to restore Sam to his old self. Obviously their relationship will remain difficult because Dean will not be able to rely on Sam as he used to, but at least the sheer resentment Dean harbours towards Sam should dissipate as soon as he realises that his brother is just as much a victim here as he is.

Dean: "I’m telling, you it’s not my brother."
Bobby: "Well, then he’s something we’ve never seen before."
Dean: "Yeah, or it’s freakin’ Lucifer."

You Can’t Handle The Truth is not a comforting episode to watch. The tension radiating from Dean is tangible and it hurts to see Dean so resentful towards his brother. Of course Dean is convinced that Sam is, in fact, not Sam at all but an impostor, i.e. Lucifer wearing his brother’s skin, so he is honestly afraid of the 'person' next to him and naturally that fear informs all of his actions towards Sam. Still, I feel that Dean’s resentment also emphasises just how much he wants to have his Sam back at his side, and I really like that despite his self-worth and abandonment issues Dean knows that his Sam loves him enough to never let him get turned by a vampire. So it's not surprising that as soon as Dean believes that Sam is indeed Sam and that he simply misinterpreted his brother's actions, it’s like a flip is switched. Dean instantly relaxes and focuses on the job, he doesn’t avoid physical proximity anymore and is able to look Sam in the eye again. For that short moment, the old brotherly dynamic is back. We know from Dean’s confession under Veritas’ spell that the moment he believed Sam’s lie about the vampire incident, he started to personally relate to Sam’s 'wrongness', convinced that his brother is just damaged, like himself, and that makes a lot of sense. After all, it’s their history that binds Sam and Dean together, the fact that their respective brother is the only person who is actually able to understand what they are going through, simply because they went through all of this together. ♥

Sam remains mostly oblivious to his brother’s crisis, understandably so. However, when Dean pretends that he rather wants to do research than come along with Sam to interrogate the murderous dentist, he obviously knows something is wrong, even if he can’t really place what. Of course Sam’s memory tells him that Dean is not really the type to prefer research to an interrogation, but he lacks the emotional perception to link his brother’s distant behaviour towards him to this deviation from Dean’s usual preferences. And on a factual level Dean’s argument makes sense, so Sam shakes his confusion off and lets it go. Later though, when Dean confronts him about the incident with the vampire, convinced that his brother is forced to tell him the truth, Sam instantly understands that Dean’s question isn’t just a factual inquiry. He knows that Dean is angry with him, specifically, and so he lies to appease his brother. Obviously Sam knows exactly how he is supposed to respond to certain emotional situations and he knows how to mimic that response. It would be really interesting to know how and when Sam works out that an emotion is directed at him. Does it depend on how strongly it is expressed, on facial and tonal expression? I mean, he is like a colour blind man who needs to pretend that he still sees colours, although he can only perceive different shades of grey. I find this facet of Sam’s 'condition' especially fascinating, and I really wished the show would explore in depth how Sam’s thought processes work at the moment.

Lisa: "The minute he walked through that door I knew it was over. You two have the most unhealthy, tangled-up crazy thing I’ve ever seen. And as long as he’s in your life, you’re never gonna be happy."

The conversation between Dean and Lisa is incredibly painful. It’s clear that Lisa still cares for Dean, but it is understandable that she has to put Ben’s well-being over her feelings for Dean. I love though that while Lisa’s words come out harsher than she intended, she basically tells Dean what she wanted to tell him anyway, truth spell or not. Their relationship strikes me as honest, and that’s emphasised by the fact that Dean apparently told Lisa all about the past couple of years. Lisa’s statement that she knew from the moment Sam walked through their door that their relationship was over, is heart wrenching, and it’s sad to think that even when she tried to convince Dean that they can make the long-distance relationship thing work, she had already given up hope that it will be possible. While I feel that generally Lisa has a very keen understanding of Dean’s psyche, I think her assessment that Dean can never be happy as long as Sam is in his life is inaccurate. It’s comprehensible that she comes to that conclusion, because she looks at the tragedy of their lives from an outsider’s perspective, however, she never witnessed the lighter, affectionate moments between the brothers, never saw how much Dean loved hunting with Sam at his side. I do think that Dean needs Lisa and Ben in his life, but to be truly happy, Dean needs Sam as well – preferably healthy and happy and close.

Anyway, it’s very telling that Dean makes no real attempt to explain to Lisa what had actually happened to him that night he visited her, and I think the fatalism he expresses in his conversation with Veritas later, shows that he had already resigned on having a family at that point. Last week's vampire incident obviously destroyed what little hope Dean had left for his relationsip with Lisa. I mean, the fear of being a monster, a killer, has been part of Dean's psyche for very long - from Devil's Trap where he was afraid of the things he would do for his family, to Dream a Little Dream Of Me where he thought of himself as dad's blunt little instrument, to his entire torturer arc in S4 - and I think that becoming a vampire fed into into that very fear, substantiating his darkest thoughts about himself. As a result, Dean closed himself off again, and I think he more or less deliberately sabotages his relationship with Lisa here by keeping silent about what happened, convinced that it is better for her and Ben to just forget about him. As usual, the Winchesters seem unable to catch a break. I am devastated at the prospect that Lisa and Dean’s relationship is over for good now. I think she is one of the best things that happened to Dean in the past couple of years and I really want him to be able to have it all – family, Sam and hunting. But hey, at least Lisa survived dating a Winchester and as long as she is out there I hold out hope that one day Dean will be able to fix things with her and Ben. ♥

Sam: "Dean, it’s me."
Dean: "You are not my brother. What are you?"

The final confrontation between the brothers, where Dean beats his brother into a bloody pulp, is extremely uncomfortable to watch. Now, it’s not difficult to rationalise Dean’s uncontrolled rage towards Sam here. It’s pent-up frustration, anger, fear and resignation that unloads in a vicious attack against the 'thing' masquerading as his brother. Everything Dean believed he could have – a family, Sam and hunting – it’s all gone in an instant, and he is left with nothing. While I believe that the grief over losing Lisa and Ben and the lingering anger and feeling of betrayal over the vampire debacle play a huge role in Dean’s attack on Sam, I think what drives him the most is the fact that he just lost Sam all over again. He simply can’t handle that on top of it all. Just as he had allowed himself to believe that he has his brother back, Sam seems as out of reach as if he were still in Lucifer’s cage. So, personally I think Dean doesn’t actually see Sam when he smashes his fist into his face over and over again, but the 'inhuman thing' that looks like his brother. I think it’s worth noting though that Dean very deliberately puts away his knife before he attacks Sam. He admitted to Veritas that had planned to kill his brother before Sam convinced him that it’s really him, but even though he got the confirmation from Veritas that Sam isn’t human anymore, he refrains from killing him here. I think that shows that he believes Sam on some level, even if he can't be sure that he actually told the truth this time around.

However, it’s important to keep in mind that while Dean’s hurt and anger and frustration are understandable, it doesn’t mean that he is entirely right. He has valid reasons to be angry about Sam’s lies, but at least where the decline of his relationship with Lisa is concerned, he cannot lay sole blame at Sam’s feet. Yes, if it had not been for Sam, Dean would never have been turned into a vampire in the first place. However, it had been Dean’s choice to call on Lisa after the fact. He knew that there was a real chance that he will not be able to control the vampire instincts – he even told Sam that he needs to be put down before he is able to hurt someone – but he decided to go to Lisa anyway. He also admitted to Lisa that he can’t bring the violence and darkness of his life home to her, but there he was, doing just that. Now, it’s clear that Dean needed closure and wanted to see Lisa just one more time before he was going to die, but that doesn’t change the fact that he deliberately endangered her and Ben just by being there. Anyway, if Dean had been in any state to actually process what Sam told him, he would have realised that beating Sam is an empty act of violence. Sam has no real comprehension of hurt, anger, pain or guilt, he can’t be 'punished' for something he doesn’t understand. The fact that Sam doesn’t even make an attempt to hit him back, should have stopped Dean cold. It’s really disconcerting to see Dean so out of control.

Sam: "Nothing scares me anymore, ‘cause I can’t feel it. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I think, I need help."

As I already said, Sam’s final admission that he can’t feel anything comes as no real surprise, but now that we know that Sam isn’t even human anymore, I feel confident that Sam’s soul is indeed missing. I think it fits well with the symptoms we have seen in Sam so far – the lack of compassion, empathy and deeply felt emotion in general – that the soul represents a person’s humanity. Now, Sam is still Sam, obviously, but without his humanity, all that is left is Sam’s training, his intellect and book smarts, which makes him an efficient hunting machine unhampered by fear, worry or the concern for others. With that in mind, Sam’s explanation as to why he allowed a vampire to turn Dean makes perfect sense. It was a simple risk/gain calculation based on factual knowledge – Dean is strong, there is a cure, it’s the perfect infiltration method – and concern for his brother’s well-being, or that of others for that matter, never factored into his decision, because emotional/moral considerations are simply absent from his repertoire. Only when the moral flaw of his argument is directly pointed out to him, namely that Dean could have died or hurt someone, he is able to connect the dots.

In this context it’s also easy to understand Sam’s past actions: When Sam returned from Lucifer’s cage, his own emotional history was gone, all that was left was factual knowledge about himself, Dean and the world they inhabit. So, it’s not surprising that Sam left Dean alone for a year, after all, he knew for a fact that Dean wanted a family and was desperate to take a break from hunting. And since he was unable to relate to Dean’s grief or understand his need for knowing that Sam is well, Sam did not think it was necessary to inform his brother of his return. He was unable to actually miss him, too, so the impetus to seek Dean out wasn’t there either. Still, I think Sam realized from the get-go that something is wrong with him, and while it doesn’t worry or concern him, obviously, it bothers him, like a phantom ache, a dissonance between what is and what should be. However, he has no way to deduct the exact nature of his 'wrongness' on his own, because he lacks the right frame of reference. In that context I find it noteworthy that Bobby mentions in his conversation with Dean that they tested Sam in every way possible and considering how eager Sam was to repeat those tests in front of Dean in Exile On Main Street, I think they have been a way for Sam to try and prove to himself that he is okay. A test delivers facts and facts do not lie, right?

I think though that when Sam met Dean again, something changed for him. Dean challenges Sam's perception of himself, not least because, ultimately, Dean is the only one who actually knows who Sam is supposed to be. As a result Sam perceives his brother as an invaluable resource of self-evaluation and hence seeks out his company. "Things are better with you around," Sam told Dean and I think he absolutely meant that. So, why did he lie to Dean about his lack of emotions in the first place? I assume Sam figured it's unlikely that Dean will help him if he is not convinced that he is really Sam. The last time Dean thought that Sam is 'not right', he called him a monster and they went separate ways, so Sam came to the logical conclusion that pretending to be 'Dean's Sammy' will most likely result in his brother’s cooperation. The decision of whether to tell Dean the truth or lie to him has been based on the same principle as all of Sam's other decisions, namely risk/gain calculation. I think that’s why he lies to Dean when he asks him about the vampire incident or when Veritas asks him how he feels about the band being together again. He can’t lose Dean now. He is unable to do this alone and that’s why I am convinced that Sam tells the truth when Dean confronts him in the end – not because he feels guilty for lying to Dean, but because at that point – with his secret revealed by Veritas herself – it’s the only logical course of action that might secure him Dean’s help.

And while we are talking about lies: I know that a lot of fans accuse Sam of being a notorious liar, but I don't think it's that simple. I mean, if we look at the reasons why Sam is lying, a very clear pattern emerges. In 9 out of 10 cases Sam lies because he is afraid of rejection. Usually he hides things that he believes will make others - and especially Dean - look at him differently, things that will brand him as a freak. He lied to Jessica about who he is, partly because he wanted to protect her, but partly so he didn't stand out as 'different'. He lied to Dean by omission about having visions or being tainted with demon blood. He lied about using his powers and about drinking Ruby's blood. In all these instances he hid from Dean because he feared to lose his brothers respect and love, a point most explicitly made in When The Levee Breaks. So, I think Sam's deception about his true state of being in S6 falls right into line with all his other lies. His reasons might be less emotional this time around, but the end goal is the same: Dean's acceptance.

A personal note at the end, something that weighs on me whenever I leave my own little corner of fandom: I find the general lack of sympathy for Sam’s situation unsettling. It upsets me when I read that people hate Sam or believe that he deserves the beating Dean gives him in You Can’t Handle The Truth. The number of fans who seem unwilling or unable to acknowledge that we have to take extenuating circumstances into account when we assess Sam’s actions throws me. I mean, Jared and the writers did all but hang a neon sign above Sam’s head to show that the Sam who jumped into the pit is not the Sam who came out of it – that he lost the very thing that made him Sam, his humanity (soul) – and still people insist on judging him by standards that no longer apply. It’s not like Sam has a real choice here or hurts Dean on purpose. Sam sacrificed himself to save the world and as a 'reward' he suffered an undetermined amount of time in Lucifer’s cage before his soul was ripped out (presumably) and he was thrown back on earth. Shouldn’t that compel people to have at least some sympathy for Sam?

What else is noteworthy:

(1) We are only six episodes into the new season and three of them have already been penned by new writers. With the loss of Eric Kripke, Jeremy Carver and Julie Siege the writer’s room needed new blood, obviously. Keeping those changes in mind, I am impressed how consistent the storylines and characterisations have been so far. In that regard S6 reminds me of S1, where the show also had a very diverse set of writers and still managed to produce a very cohesive season. I am also impressed by Sera Gamble's clear direction for the season and I think it’s fair to give her props for pacing and structuring her first season as showrunner so very well.

In conclusion: You Can’t Handle The Truth is clearly a bridge episode that prepares for the final reveal of what’s wrong with Sam and as such it feels a bit cliffhanger-y, but I really enjoyed it, well, until the last scene came around anyway. Even though the brothers’ relationship is far away from my personal comfort level at the moment, I find the current set-up fascinating enough to tide me over until Sam and Dean are fixed. I think the brothers’ quest to restore Sam could prove to be an interesting story and I hope the writers make the best of it. Personally, I am still pretty hooked by this season so far.

* * *
Did you know? Veritas snacks on the tongue of a corpse while talking to the brothers. Said tongue was made out of frozen, raw tuna covered in sauce to make it look dark brown.

Comments

[chiiyo86.livejournal.com]

Well, it's not bad for something you just "cobbled" together! *g*

I'm as fascinated as you are by Sam's thought process, and that's why I kinda hope that it will last a few episodes, be a gradual fix like you suggest - which is probably not a very popular opinion! I hope at least that I will find fics about that, although I think most fans are most likely to "fix" Sam than try to explore the way he is now.

I really like that despite his self-worth and abandonment issues Dean knows that his Sam loves him enough to never let him get turned by a vampire.

Yeah, I find that comforting, in a way. Dean has enough faith in his brother to know he wouldn't do something like that, which makes it different from the beginning of season 5 where it was Sam himself that Dean didn't trust.

So, personally I think Dean doesn’t actually see Sam when he smashes his fist into his face over and over again, but the 'inhuman thing' that looks like his brother.

I think that too. While Dean has never been above using violence against his brother, it's never been anything close to the end of this episode - but we've seen him display such violence against the things he hunts (interestingly, it reminds me the moment when he kills the ghoul inpersonating Adam...).

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

ROFL thanks! I guess after what, 5 years, I can write about Sam and Dean in my sleep, and I mean that literally in this case. *g*

... we've seen him display such violence against the things he hunts (interestingly, it reminds me the moment when he kills the ghoul inpersonating Adam...)
Oh, good catch! That's actually a really great comparison. It makes sense, it's a travesty of what family means to Dean.

Edit: Oh, I forgot: Talking about fics that explore Sam's thought process as it is now without trying to 'fix' him - you should read this episode coda: http://datenshiblue.livejournal.com/274118.html It's exactly how I think Sam's mind works!

[chiiyo86.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you the rec! :D

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

No problem, I hope you enjoy it. It's difficult to find good codas at the moment.

And I just re-read it and realised that I subconsciously re-used a phrase of that fic. /sigh I should fix that.

[llywela13.livejournal.com]

Aww, you pulled something out of the bag after all - what happened to giving yourself a break! Just couldn't do it, eh. I hope you let yourself have a really good night's sleep tonight.

Do you know, I think my favourite moment in this episode might just be Sam's 'does not compute' expression when Dean says he is going to stay home and do research. *G*

While I feel that generally Lisa has a very keen understanding of Dean’s psyche, I think her assessment that Dean can never be happy as long as Sam is in his life is inaccurate. It’s comprehensible that she comes to that conclusion, because she looks at the tragedy of their lives from an outsider’s perspective, however, she never witnessed the lighter, affectionate moments between the brothers

She has also never really actually met Sam, has she? That we've seen. She saw him in passing back in 3.02 but didn't have so much as a conversation with him, and by the time their paths crossed again in 6.01 Sam was already in the state we see him now - plus, again, they didn't really interact. All she knows of Sam is what Dean has told her and what she has witnessed of the effect Sam has on Dean, which from her perspective is not a positive thing at all. So I totally agree that she has no way to believe that Sam being back could work out well for her and Dean. I just hope that one day they can all prove that wrong!

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

ROFL yeah, really couldn't do it. I was intent on letting it rest when I came home today and then I found myself furiously typing away for a couple of hours. The review doesn't feel smooth to me though and there is so much more depth in that episode than I was able to explore at the moment. I could have easily written double the word count. LOL

I think my favourite moment in this episode might just be Sam's 'does not compute' expression
ROFL yeah, that's such a cute moment. It's one of my favourite moments as well, it's up there with the little choked up 'Sammy' Dean lets out when he believes Sam is really Sam. *wibbles*

She has also never really actually met Sam, has she?
Very good point! Although I am not that sure it would have made a difference. She has a point when she states that Sam and Dean's relationship has always bordered on deeply unhealthy. She explicitly says that even though she loves her sister, she would never bring her back from the dead. It's not so much a question if Sam is a great person or if Dean loves Sam, it's the extent of that love that is scary from an outside perspective. :)

[sherrilina.livejournal.com]

Lol, I love that expression as well, it keeps showing up more and more often....like a confused puppy look! :p

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

LOL nobody does confused puppy like Jared! ♥

[sherrilina.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I don't get the Sammy hate, especially from people who know he has no soul...I mean WTF? How is he supposed to be held accountable when he's missing something so important? *rolleyes*

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

Exactly! There are always people who will hate Sam no matter what, that's just how fandom works, but if we look at the story as it is presented to us, it's clear that Sam is just a victim here. I get that the writers make things more difficult by not giving us sympathetic insight into Sam's perspective, instead showing everything through Dean's eyes who is understandbly hurt, but some people don't even seem to make an effort to try and see things through Sam's eyes. /sigh

[lindahoyland.livejournal.com]

THank you for this as I'm very curious what is going on.

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

You're welcome! I am glad you get some insight through my reviews. :)

[zaphael-firefly.livejournal.com]

Love reading your ep reviews.

I got a new computer and lost all my old favorites so I could no longer find your site so happy I found it again. :-D

"While I feel that generally Lisa has a very keen understanding of Dean’s psyche, I think her assessment that Dean can never be happy as long as Sam is in his life is inaccurate. It’s comprehensible that she comes to that conclusion, because she looks at the tragedy of their lives from an outsider’s perspective, however, she never witnessed the lighter, affectionate moments between the brothers, never saw how much Dean loved hunting with Sam at his side. I do think that Dean needs Lisa and Ben in his life, but to be truly happy, Dean needs Sam as well – preferably healthy and happy and close."

I was slighly miffed off at the writers for getting rid of Lisa in this way, it felt like a cheap character assassination.
On the point of Dean and happiness I find myself cynical about the idea of Dean ability to actually be happy. Dean is a martyr the only time he is happy is when he is nailing himself to a cross. His family is his ultimate cross, Sam is the nails in his feet and hands. Dean has been one of the most developed characters on the show, but he's the least changed. His character is stagnant in his suffering. Jensen is a fine actor, but I swear if I have to see him go all dewy eyed one more time I'm going to hurl.

"The final confrontation between the brothers, where Dean beats his brother into a bloody pulp, is extremely uncomfortable to watch. Now, it’s not difficult to rationalise Dean’s uncontrolled rage towards Sam here."

Dean's reaction is understandable to a certain extent, but on the other hand, Dean was willing to kill Sam without any proof that this wasn't Sam just damaged from his time in Hell. There is nothing that Sam's done in this season deserving of death. You don't trust someone you don't work with them, you don't unload two slugs in the back of their skull while they sleep.

"When Sam returned from Lucifer’s cage, his own emotional history was gone, all that was left was factual knowledge about himself, Dean and the world they inhabit. So, it’s not surprising that Sam left Dean alone for a year, after all, he knew for a fact that Dean wanted a family and was desperate to take a break from hunting."

Thank you for pointing this so elegantly out, this has been a frustration point for me when reading other reviews. People don't seem to understand what is going on with Sam at this moment, nor do they give him credit for making the best choices he can make in his current state. He can no longer empathize with Dean's pain or anger, he remembers how he used to react he tries desperately to mimic those reactions for others; but has no understanding of why he should react in such a way. You can't fake what you don't have.

Loved your review and if I sound a little cranky or even anti-Dean it's out of pure frustration and love for the characters not because I hate Dean.
Dean as a character has lost his teeth so to speak, he's predictable.

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

Welcome back! :)

I was slighly miffed off at the writers for getting rid of Lisa in this way, it felt like a cheap character assassination.
Hm, I don't feel this way. I think Lisa's reaction to the events is perfectly in character and understandable. She knows Dean very well, but she still only has a limited perspective on his life. As long as she is still alive, I can always see a reconciliation between her and Dean. Maybe not now, but after some time has passed.

Dean is a martyr the only time he is happy is when he is nailing himself to a cross.
I don't think that's fair. Life dealt Dean a pretty shitty hand these last couple of years. It's not like he chose to be the universe's pawn. Yes, Dean's love for his family is a predictable weak spot every bad guy loves to exploit, however, for me it's integral to who Dean is. Change is good, but there are some traits you can't change without making the character unrecognisable. It doesn't actually need much to make Dean happy - family, saving people, hunting things. I still think that applies, it just hasn't been a real option for quite a while now. :)

Dean was willing to kill Sam without any proof that this wasn't Sam
Well, this is me rationalising. I do think that Dean was utterly wrong when he beat Sam up. And I also think that Dean only considered killing Sam, because he was convinced that he is actually Lucifer. I, too, came to the conclusion that Sam would never allow a vampire to turn Dean, no matter how damaged he is from Lucifer's cage, so I understand that Dean thought Sam isn't Sam at all.

People don't seem to understand what is going on with Sam at this moment, nor do they give him credit for making the best choices he can make in his current state.
I know! The lack of sympathy and understanding for Sam in fandom really kills me. I feel so badly for this Sam. I think a lot of people simply make no effort to understand him, the same was true in S4 as well. Sam as a character has always been more of a challenge. His emotions and motivations are not always as in your face as Dean's are. The writers often make us work hard for Sam's frame of mind, but that makes it all the more rewarding to look into it. These last couple of years Sam has been extremely fascinating to me, even moreso than Dean, and I love Dean dearly.

[zaphael-firefly.livejournal.com]

I will admit that I was a little harsh with Dean on the martyr thing, but if you know people who are 'martyrs' they have the same horrible propensity for making sacrifices no one asked them to make, and then blame you for not taking their sacrifice into account. Dean's bitching Sam out about his 'dying' wish and how he went to Hell for Sam was typical martyr behavior. Sam didn't ask for Dean to make a deal. Dean has been self-righteous for the last four years, even Castiel is tired of it. (referencing to the comment in 6.7 about only Dean's wants coming first)

" It doesn't actually need much to make Dean happy - family, saving people, hunting things. I still think that applies, it just hasn't been a real option for quite a while now. :)"

The problem with Dean is that he hasn't been 'happy' for years, understandably so.
But I will argue that 'family hasn't made him happy in years, nor has hunting, and saving people has become a burden.
Season 4-6 Dean's outlook on hunting and Sam is that they are burdens he has to carry. Dean's too codependent to ever seek out his own happiness because it means he's being selfish he's being a bad son, brother and human being if he isn't doing the things that are now hurting him.
Dean needed a break from hunting but never pursued it until Sam was out of the picture, had Sam miraculously lived Stull Dean still would have been hunting even thought he is clearly burned out.

" And I also think that Dean only considered killing Sam, because he was convinced that he is actually Lucifer. I, too, came to the conclusion that Sam would never allow a vampire to turn Dean, no matter how damaged he is from Lucifer's cage, so I understand that Dean thought Sam isn't Sam at all."

Castiel assured him that Sam wasn't Lucifer, they'd done all the tests that they could do to make sure that Sam was Sam.
Dean was desperately grasping at straws, yes, because the alternative of Sam letting him get turned hurt too much. Betrayal is always painful, especially when it's done by a loved one.
I've been frustrated with Dean attitude toward Sam for years.
Dean doesn't look at his brother and actually See Sam, not the person who he's become anyway. Season 3 Sam was falling apart right before Dean's eyes, he was willing to cut out Nancy's heart. This should have been a clue as to what was to come once Dean's deal came through, but in Season 4 Dean rings his hands about how Sam's changed and he doesn't know when. In Season 5 Dean throws Sam's decision making skill in Sam's face every chance he got, yes, Dean was hurt but he seemed to conveniently forget that he broke the first seal, and that he was going on the same 'killing Lilith would stop the end of the world' assumption that Sam was until oh, yes the last episode.
I love both characters, but I'm getting tired of Dean always suffering and always looking at Sam as to the cause of the suffering. Dean can walk away anytime. Sam isn't holding him there.

[galathea-snb.livejournal.com]

Dean's too codependent to ever seek out his own happiness because it means he's being selfish.
I agree here. I always thought that Dean's inability to put his own well-being first is just as damaging as Sam's occasional self-centred tunnel-vision. Dean's self-sacrificial nature is often praised in fandom as a virtue, but I think it's destructive, not only to himself but also to others - especially Sam. Dean is not perfect or a saint, he has many glaring flaws and I think he is equally as responsible for the problems in the brothers' relationship as Sam is.

I will argue that 'family hasn't made him happy in years, nor has hunting, and saving people has become a burden.
Yes, but that's only because these past couple of years it just has never been about saving people and hunting things with his family. As their situation grew dire, hunting has become more and more a means of distraction rather than something Dean (or Sam) could enjoy for the sake of it. The struggle to stay afloat in the malstrom of events that threatened to drown them both didn't allow for them just being them, enjoying the simple things in life. I think Dean would be able to find back to the satisfaction he always got from his job, if he and Sam wouldn't always be drawn back into the centre of events that are out of their control.

Dean doesn't look at his brother and actually see Sam, not the person who he's become anyway.
That's true. Dean had an incredibly hard time to adjust to the changes in Sam ever since S3. He was unable to let go of the ideal of Sam he had in his head for a long time, an ideal that was very hard for Sam to meet, I think. In S3/4 Dean's approach to Sam was a lot about denial and self-worth. He thought Sam was stronger than him, he flat out refused to see for a long time how destructive his deal has been for his brother. I think that in the last quarter of S5 Dean was finally able to accept and embrace Sam for who he is, rather than who he wants him to be, but unfortunately Sam jumped into the cage before they had been able to move their relationship to a new stage. I still hope to see that in S6 though.

Dean was hurt but he seemed to conveniently forget that he broke the first seal
Hm, no, Dean comes right out in 5x05 and admits that Sam couldn't have known about Lilith and he is open about his guilt in regards to the first seal as well. Dean's anger towards Sam was never about breaking the last seal, it was about trusting a demon, drinking blood and lying to Dean over and over again. It was about Sam turning away from him when he needed his brother the most. I am not saying that Dean didn't make mistakes in S4, but Sam's decision making hasn't been the best either. He admits so himself.